there's paper in my vomit.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Randomize