sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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