I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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