Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
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