How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize