Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize