When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
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she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
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Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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