Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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