bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
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put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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