Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(703): View more from Virginia

Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”

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(703): Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh” http://tfl.nu/trqs

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(602): View more from Arizona

I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.

(623): View more from Arizona

Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.

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(602): I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one. (623): Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully. http://tfl.nu/x05a

Replies (36) Good night (4538) Bad night (509)
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(330): View more from Ohio

We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.

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(330): We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever. http://tfl.nu/56mg

Replies (38) Good night (10083) Bad night (660) Order T-Shirt
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(858): View more from California

I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.

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(858): I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast. http://tfl.nu/8lsx

Replies (31) Good night (4300) Bad night (1361) Order T-Shirt
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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.

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(484): wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day. http://tfl.nu/pyo4

Replies (7) Good night (4894) Bad night (756) Order T-Shirt
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(859): View more from Kentucky

So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke

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(859): So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke http://tfl.nu/0mgq

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(732): View more from New Jersey

test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE

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(732): test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE http://tfl.nu/cfpm

Replies (7) Good night (1300) Bad night (1753) Order T-Shirt
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(713): View more from Texas

Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on

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(713): Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on http://tfl.nu/6fw7

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(646): View more from New York

HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.

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(646): HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS. http://tfl.nu/gw0q

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(941): View more from Florida

We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.

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(941): We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships. http://tfl.nu/x14j

Replies (5) Good night (2730) Bad night (639)
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?

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(617): How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity? http://tfl.nu/1m4t

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(+61): View more from Australia

Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.

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(+61): Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night. http://tfl.nu/mvw7

Replies (6) Good night (2440) Bad night (305)
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(765): View more from Indiana

google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?

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(765): google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY? http://tfl.nu/u2sp

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(310): View more from California

We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating

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(310): We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating http://tfl.nu/6jwq

Replies (17) Good night (732) Bad night (1353) Order T-Shirt
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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.

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(724): If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant. http://tfl.nu/s61d

Replies (1) Good night (1053) Bad night (228)

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