so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
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