they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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