Texts From Last Night

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  (440): View more from Ohio

  The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"

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  (440): The ticket read "Found nude in a tree" http://tfl.nu/6rf6
  Replies (47) Good night (47527) Bad night (2091) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss

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  (516): I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss http://tfl.nu/w0b9
  Replies (34) Good night (5735) Bad night (1326) Order T-Shirt
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.

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  (970): she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park. http://tfl.nu/5xdu
  Replies (11) Good night (804) Bad night (3926) Order T-Shirt
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight

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  (617): yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight http://tfl.nu/f9xl
  Replies (29) Good night (565) Bad night (7457) Order T-Shirt
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.

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  (919): i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me. http://tfl.nu/ilti
  Replies (42) Good night (9988) Bad night (788)
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  (607): View more from New York

  Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.

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  (607): Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later. http://tfl.nu/om4f
  Replies (27) Good night (4563) Bad night (1361) Order T-Shirt
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.

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  (802): Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you. http://tfl.nu/ose0
  Replies (3) Good night (747) Bad night (3014)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.

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  (937): The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15. http://tfl.nu/cktg
  Replies (24) Good night (1175) Bad night (4189) Order T-Shirt
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor

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  (780): A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor http://tfl.nu/h37q
  Replies (14) Good night (2556) Bad night (862) Order T-Shirt
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  (801): View more from Utah

  It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.

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  (801): It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me. http://tfl.nu/14do
  Replies (5) Good night (1617) Bad night (774) Order T-Shirt
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.

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  (918): I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance. http://tfl.nu/ugp3
  Replies (13) Good night (1437) Bad night (805) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.

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  (516): Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper. http://tfl.nu/j9dy
  Replies (7) Good night (1533) Bad night (417) Order T-Shirt
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.

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  (973): Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle. http://tfl.nu/gy9y
  Replies (16) Good night (461) Bad night (1125) Order T-Shirt
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  (310): View more from California

  He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed

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  (310): He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed http://tfl.nu/mil9
  Replies (3) Good night (271) Bad night (1102) Order T-Shirt
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  (298): View more from

  The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.

  (208): View more from Idaho

  You're the only meteorologist I listen to.

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  (298): The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations. (208): You're the only meteorologist I listen to. http://tfl.nu/2k8s
  Replies (3) Good night (1713) Bad night (192)

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