We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize