Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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