the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
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