A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize