my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
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