i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
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