This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
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