He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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