areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
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