Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Randomize