I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When are your genitals available?
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
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