Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
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I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
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