fuck your aforementioned shoe
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize