last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
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they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
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the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
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