sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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