Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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