I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
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