last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize