I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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