I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize