There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize