they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
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