the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
two words...techno handjob
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
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