Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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