ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Randomize