Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Randomize