Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize