before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Randomize