who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Boobs speak an international language.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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