I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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