Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
if only i could text you this smell
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
You ruined the universe
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize