the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Randomize