My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
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How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
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Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
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