I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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