Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
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