we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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