Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize